Home > Uncategorized > Report: Unemployment High Because People Keep Blowing Their Job Interviews | The Onion – America\’s Finest News Source

Report: Unemployment High Because People Keep Blowing Their Job Interviews | The Onion – America\’s Finest News Source

(The Onion)

WASHINGTON—With unemployment at its highest level in decades, the U.S. Department of Labor issued a report Tuesday suggesting the crisis is primarily the result of millions of Americans just completely blowing their job interviews.

According to the findings, seven out of 10 Americans could have landed their dream job last month if they had known where they see themselves in five years, and the number of unemployed could be reduced from 14.6 million to 5 million if everyone simply greeted potential employers with firmer handshakes, maintained eye contact, and stopped fiddling with their hair and face so much.

via Report: Unemployment High Because People Keep Blowing Their Job Interviews | The Onion – America\’s Finest News Source.

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